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Privacy NoticeWith more than half of British people admitting to feeling stressed at work according to YouGov, for many going to a 9-5 comes with a whole host of pressures and anxieties. So much so, almost four in 10 workers carry this workplace stress into their personal lives, too. So, as April marks Stress Awareness Month, OK! speaks to three women who transformed their lives by turning their back on their existing careers and taking a leap into the unknown… ‘I was a health visitor, but after four miscarriages I was crippled by grief’ Driving away from the day’s sixth appointment, Lynsey Bleakley parked up and burst into tears. The specialist nurse health visitors has just been to see an expectant mum. It was a job she’d loved for more than 10 years – but now everything had changed and she didn’t know if she could carry on.
Lynsey Bleakley gave up her 10-year long job to pursue her dream of being a baker
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Lynsey had just suffered her fourth miscarriage. “Every time I saw a glorious bump or spoke to a mum cradling her baby, it ripped me to pieces,” says the 45-year-old. “Supporting new and expectant mums had been my calling and the most rewarding, fulfilling job. But after what we’d been through, it was killing me. It took my husband, James, and my mum, Joyce, to finally convince me to walk away. I was heartbroken. “After my first miscarriage I’d been admitted to hospital for six weeks because the stress and anxiety had caused such extreme physical reactions. I started acupuncture, CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy) and therapy, but didn’t take enough time away from the stresses of my work, although I didn’t know I had three more miscarriages on the horizon.” Lynsey was 35 and mum to daughter Yazmin when she met James. They married fewer than 18 months later and talked about having children together. Two years on, having failed to conceive, they sought fertility advice, but a week later learnt Lynsey was pregnant. “Sadly, days after getting that amazing news, I felt unwell and went to hospital, where it was confirmed I’d had a miscarriage at six weeks,” she says. “It was a massive blow, but I knew miscarriage isn’t uncommon, so I took a few months away from work before finding out I was pregnant again.” Again, though, the pregnancy didn’t last, and about a year later Lynsey had yet another miscarriage.
Lynsey had been “teetering on the brink” for months before she made the decision to give up her job
(Image: Gillian Robb/Bumble and Goose)
“It was falling pregnant for the fourth time in 2017, and then losing the baby again, that really broke me,” she said. “Four miscarriages in less than two years crippled me with grief that I refused to acknowledge or process.” Lynsey says she’d been “teetering on the brink” for months before making the decision to leave nursing. “I was crying almost daily, often in front of Yazmin. Every day was a struggle. Something had to change.” James assured Lynsey they’d cope with only one income. “Stepping down from my job was one of the hardest things I’d ever done, but my manager told me to rest and see my doctor. “The relief at not having to pretend I was OK any more was overwhelming, like I’d been released from a cage.” Lynsey needed a new focus and her therapist suggested revisiting a pastime that gave her one – baking. “Within days of making batches of brownies and biscuits, I felt like my mind was cleared, the anxiety and chatter was gone, and I had a purpose,” she says. “I took orders from friends and family, and woke up each day with a job to do – not a paid one, but one I loved and which I was appreciated for.”
Lynsey started off by baking for friends and family
(Image: Gillian Robb/Bumble and Goose)
Packing her 16-year-old daughter off to school with treats for her friends, Lynsey was often asked if she could make more and she was told she should start selling her bakes. “James could see the change in me, how I’d been transformed into a happy person again for the first time in years,” she adds. Lynsey’s dad, Brian, and James built a bakehouse in the back garden of the couple’s home in Ballyholme, Co Down. “It was towards the end of 2019 when I first thought this could be a viable business – and a few months later the pandemic hit,” says Lynsey. “But an online baking business was perfectly placed to thrive, while others had to close.” ‘Virtual hugs’ “The turning point was me reaching out to a woman on Instagram who went by the name of Sketchy Muma and had a similar history of baby loss. We formed a partnership. In the autumn of 2020, when everyone was stuck at home unable to see their loved ones, we created ‘virtual hugs’ – my biscuits with her sketches on. Overnight we were deluged with orders. “We then started doing corporate work for the likes of AstraZeneca, who wanted to send their employees little treats while working from home. In a few months, my business Bumble & Goose had become a success.”
With orders from across the world, Lynsey admits she is “surprised” by how things have turned out
Now with orders coming from across the UK – and the world – Lynsey is as “surprised as anyone” at her success. “I never thought of myself as a businesswoman, or even a particularly good baker, but I guess good things happen when you least expect them. I’ve a staff of six now, with plans to expand further. I have to pinch myself that this is happening to me,” she says. “I’ve got so much to be thankful for – an amazing husband and a gorgeous daughter – but I still suffer from anxiety and still have therapy. The hardest days are Mother’s Day and anniversaries of the miscarriages, but I have coping mechanisms. I go for long walks with our dogs and Yazmin along the beach, I meditate, I focus on the positives. “It’s important to accept and acknowledge that it’s OK to have more than one career – and it’s crucial to look after your emotional and physical wellbeing. “Ask those closest to you if they’d support you in taking a step out of your comfort zone. Feelings of fear and anxiety can leave you feeling trapped, but once you take that step you might find the most amazing opportunities.” For further information, visit bumbleandgoose.co.uk ‘Office politics finally took their toll after 15 years of high-octane pressure’ Emma Simarro, 39, from Surrey, quit the world of corporate finance to help other women find balance in their lives
Emma Simarro is now a personal trainer and helps women navigate modern day stressors
“As I dashed out of work to catch the 5.23pm commuter train from Waterloo, I realised that the allure of my sales job was starting to wear off. After 15 years working in finance, the long days, hours spent travelling and office politics were taking a toll on me. It hadn’t always been like this. When I first secured a place on a corporate graduate scheme, things couldn’t have been better. I was constantly visiting different people up and down the country, on a good salary, and living on the adrenaline rush of securing a new sale. I loved it. But that all changed when I had my first daughter, Evie, in 2015. After returning from maternity leave the year after, I knew it was only a matter of time before something had to give. Each day I’d get up at 5.30am and drop my daughter off at nursery before heading to work. I remember crying in the car because I was so overwhelmed.
Emma is mum to daughters Evie and Darcey
While many of my colleagues were understanding, some didn’t seem to get the pressure I was under as a new mum and rolled their eyes when I apologetically left at 5.05pm every day to pick my daughter up. As a result, I compensated by spending two hours each night doing extra work. When Saturday arrived, I was too wired to enjoy it. While on a walk with my husband, Darren, he had to tell me to slow down. I was so used to doing things at a fast pace that I’d gone off without him. In 2018 I gave birth to my second child, Darcey, and used my maternity leave to think about whether I wanted to live like this any more. While the money was good, it wasn’t enough to justify losing my sense of self. I decided to hand in my notice. During my second pregnancy, I’d qualified as a personal trainer. Darren was supportive and I knew I wanted to make a career of it. Now my mission is to help other women find balance. I work with women who are facing the physical effects of stress. Some have put on weight due to stress eating, others have such high cortisol levels it’s affecting their hormones, while some have lost their periods.
Emma often sees clients who are facing physical effects of stress, such as absent periods
(Image: Rebecca Price)
Most of what I do is related to the perimenopause and beyond. This period typically occurs when women are hitting career milestones, so my focus is looking at stresses from their professional and personal lives and figuring out how they can manage it through exercise, nutrition, self-care and sleep. One client told me she hadn’t eaten since breakfast. When I asked her why, she said she’d been in back-to-back calls and hadn’t had the chance to take a break. I was the same and lost an unhealthy amount of weight because I was always skipping meals. It’s important for me to tell women to set clear boundaries around their work day. Whether that’s taking their lunch hour or factoring exercise into their routine, these are simple things that can help manage stress.
Emma encourages clients to set clear boundaries and to make time for themselves
(Image: Rebecca Price)
Women give so much time to other people that they lose sight of investing in themselves. But you can’t pour from an empty cup. I recently took my daughters to see where I used to work and they couldn’t believe it – they’ve only really known me in gym clothes. Since leaving my stressful job, I feel I have more control over my life.” For more, visit emmasimarro.com and @emmasimarropt on Instagram ‘I was a disillusioned police officer when I had the revelation that changed my life’ Jen Culley, 38, from Leamington Spa, swapped exposure to violence for a role supporting mums-to-be and new parents
Jen Culley joined the police force when she was 23 years old
“I was scrolling through Facebook when I had a revelation that changed the course of my life. At the time – 2017 – I was a police officer on maternity leave with my second child, Zach. The prospect of returning to work was filling me with dread. I was feeling increasingly disillusioned with my job, working long and irregular shifts on the frontline, regularly exposed to violence and with little work-life balance. I had joined Greater Manchester police at the age of 23, inspired by my grandfather, Wilf Cain, who’d told me exciting stories about his time in the force. But what I witnessed was horrific. On patrol alone, often at night, I was regularly threatened and worried for my safety. In 2010 I married Damien, who I’d met at university. I moved to Thames Valley police, commuting from leamington Spa. It was two years later that a police officer I’d trained with was murdered on patrol. I began to seriously question if I could keep doing it.
The death of a fellow police officer made Jen begin to question whether she could continue with her career
Damien and I were trying to start a family. I felt sure the stress of my work was adding to our problems conceiving. We had IVF and I was lucky enough to become pregnant first time. But my experience giving birth to Orla in January 2015 was horrible. at 42 weeks I was induced and given no support when I had problems breastfeeding. For months after the birth I felt disconnected from our daughter. It was supposed to be lovely, but it was the complete opposite. I returned to work part-time in June 2016, then three months later became pregnant again. I was determined not to be induced, but when I reached 42 weeks again a doctor said, “If your baby dies, you’ll find it hard to forgive yourself.” So I reluctantly agreed. I took control of some aspects of the birth by being very clear with the midwives, but I felt it shouldn’t be this way. Shortly after Zach’s birth I spotted an advert for an NCT [National Childbirth Trust] course to become an antenatal teacher and breastfeeding counsellor. I began the Birth and Beyond foundation degree in September 2017, one day a week at Worcester University, and remote learning from home. Two months later, I handed in my notice to the police after a decade of service. It was a relief.
Jen enrolled on a Birth and Beyond foundation degree course prior to handing in her notice
I hired an independent midwife for my third pregnancy. Dom was born in October 2018 after a quick and straightforward labour in a birthing pool at home. It was an incredible experience. I picked up my studies the following September and realised I wanted to be a doula – a professional birthing partner providing emotional and physical support during pregnancy, at the birth and postnatally. By Christmas 2021, I had my doula certification. I now partner with a mum at any point in the pregnancy, then afterwards in their home, helping them breastfeed and continue their lovely journey. So far, I’ve been hired by 20 couples. I feel so privileged to have this role. I’m part of the most positive, supportive community. It is beyond my wildest dreams. I don’t regret leaving the police. It was a secure, reliable job with a good pension, but my heart wasn’t in it. Now I’m my own boss, I look forward to the day ahead and get to spend so much more time with my children.” READ MORE: Click here for today’s top showbiz news Confessions of a celeb wedding planner: ‘£1.7m budgets, 90 staff and 3am texts’ ‘Like Corrie’s Daisy, I faced an acid attack – it wasn’t just my life that changed’ ‘Brooklyn Beckham be warned! I’m a tattoo artist – certain designs can be a curse’ Get exclusive celebrity stories and shoots straight to your inbox with OK!’s daily newsletter Story SavedYou can find this story in My Bookmarks.Or by navigating to the user icon in the top right.Follow OK! MagazineFacebookTwitterCommentMore OnReal LifeHealth
